Building Your Own Road: Why The Path Takes Longer When You Have To Create It Yourself.
- Marie Michel Thermil
- Mar 26
- 4 min read
Some roads are well-traveled and glorified. Others? Well, they don’t exist until you build them yourself. That takes patience, faith, and the courage to stand out in a world that enforces conformity, upholds biased standards, and recycles ideas that lack nuance.
The Challenge of the Uncharted Path
Stepping away from the well-paved, conventional road means stepping into uncertainty. There’s a bit of “comparison is the thief of joy” at play here. You see others moving forward with confidence, already established, already succeeding. Meanwhile, you’re standing at square one, staring at a blank map, wondering where to even begin. This stage is very humbling—regardless of all the experience you have amassed throughout your life until then! 😅🙃
Looking to others who’ve done something similar can be inspiring, but it can also present a slippery slope of comparison. It’s a normal, human impulse, but it can quickly turn into frustration. Watching someone with a thriving audience, sold-out offerings, and a waitlist of eager clients can trigger the urge to measure your progress against theirs. But here’s the thing—trying to follow their exact route won’t work. Because they’re not you, and you’re not them.
Owning Your Unique Journey
You are the only you that has ever existed. That means your path will be as unique as you are. And the beautiful part? By forging your own way, you’re also paving the way for others—first to follow in your footsteps, then to branch off and create their own. Stepping into your own (particular kind of) magic is what makes your dreams work.
But let’s be real: if we get caught up in mimicking someone else’s perceived success, our own road might take even longer to build. Detours are inevitable. They are often there to test our patience and challenge us to stay connected to our why. Even though it’s part of the process, losing sight of why you started this whole thing in the first place is aggravating as hell and if left unchecked, can be quite discouraging.
If you have a dream in your heart and the passion (and patience) to ground it in reality, don’t let anybody lead you to believe that your unconventional, non-linear path is not worth pursuing or exploring.
How to Keep Moving Forward
As cliché as it may sound, one step and one day at a time—that’s all you can do to keep moving forward. When the journey feels overwhelming, here are a few things that can help:
1. Your own authenticity is the key
Stay rooted in your why: Write it down. Revisit it. Make it your morning affirmation. Let it be your guiding compass.
Detach from comparison: Learn from others, but resist the urge to measure your worth against their timeline. It will preserve the essence of your vision.
Be consistent : Not every day is gonna look the same. So, to help you stay the course, take the time to find your own rhythm and a consistency that is conducive to your well-being.
2. Allow yourself to be a beginner. No one starts as an expert, growth takes time.
Embrace delays and detours as lessons: Sometimes, what feels like a setback is actually redirection toward something better suited, that’s gonna propel you even further forward. Progress isn’t always linear, obliquity is a concept worth keeping in mind.
Get comfortable with discomfort: The fear of being seen, the awkwardness of self-promotion, the sting of rejection—all of these are part of the journey. The more you face them, the less power they have over you and the more enjoyable your experience can be.
Reframe the outcome of your first tries: It’s easy to judge your worth or the legitimacy of your endeavors by how many people showed up (or didn’t). Keeping progress in mind, it’s important to learn to be okay with being the only one showing up for yourself and cheering for a little while.
3. Don’t do it alone, community is important!
Identify your support system: Having people around who keep you centered and sane while you’re attempting something new will keep you on track for progression out of "beginner" mode.
Find other beginners or road pavers: There’s an increasing number of people branching off and starting anew. Surround yourself with people who understand your current struggle and are going through similar growing pains. It makes the whole thing less lonely and more affirming!
Be open to receiving help: Support doesn’t always come in the form of money, some people genuinely want to uplift you. And let’s not forget that skill exchanges and knowledge sharing are the old/new currency so, be open to collaboration.
Most importantly, don’t forget to have fun with it. This is your road after all, make sure to sprinkle (a lot of) joy along your exploration.
Trusting the Process
This road isn’t just about arriving somewhere—it’s about becoming someone you are proud of. Fear, excitement, doubt, courage, patience, timing, and creativity are all part of the mix. And while luck also plays a role, it’s only a small piece of the puzzle. Progress comes more easily when you embrace these experiences and allow them to move through you.
So if your path feels long, winding, and uncharted, remember: you’re building something that hasn’t existed before. And that’s pretty damn powerful!
You got this! Wishing you courage and clarity on your journey. And if you ever need a partner who provides insights, aligned encouragement and tools to navigate your path, I’m here to help! ✨